There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..