BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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