I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
