playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Can't talk, ducks in the car
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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