if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize