apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize