it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
