Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
