Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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