508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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