school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize