dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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