I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
We just shotgunned beers for America
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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