From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
