He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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