i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
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