my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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