i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
