I think I died a long time ago.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
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He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
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I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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