Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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