That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
