I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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