she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Screwed.edu
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize