I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
