Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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