my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize