my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
