O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize