Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
