Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
