lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
