How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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