Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
