it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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