In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
