some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
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