How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize