apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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