Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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