No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
