I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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