Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Randomize
