Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
