Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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