Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
