U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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