i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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