Sry I called you an 8
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
