Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
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The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
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Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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