im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Randomize
