Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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