I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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